To establish my surviving shitty states credentials: I grew up as a queer kid in the rural Bible Belt during the Clinton and Bush (both of them) years. The current environment may not be exactly the same, but IMO in many ways it’s very similar to the community I grew up in (extremely conservative, racist, and vindictive).
So, here are the things that kept me comparatively sane:
Watch subversive media, whatever that means to you. Being reminded that there is a wider world with people who aren’t like the ones surrounding you (whether it’s your family or wider community) is a powerful hope generator
Connect with similarly minded people in your local community, if you aren’t already. You might need to drive to a college town for this one, depending on your area. Having IRL connections with people who aren’t bastards will keep you sane
Find the joy you can, and make it when you can’t. If you don’t find things to be happy about it will seriously kill you. There’s always stuff to be miserable about, so don’t worry about overdoing it in the joy department
Do something you find meaningful. Volunteering, clean ups, whatever you feel drawn towards. Doesn’t even have to be anything official, like checking in on your loved ones
Get some healthy eating and exercise in when you can, too. If it doesn’t improve your mood it’ll at least let you sleep and poop better
Make a plan to run if you have to. Cash reserve, good backpack, identification and other paperwork, a couple of changes of clothes.
Make a plan to move. Save as much money as you can and set a date. We began planning our move in 2020 and our deadline was last summer.
We successfully completed our move to a better state and are much happier. Like a weight has been lifted off us. It was difficult but very much wotth it.
Thank you for inspiring me. I try to collect money to move, and although it seems like a lost cause rn, your positive experience makes me sure I do the right thing.
I can’t tell you how I appreciate your long answer. I already do parts of what you are suggesting. And I’d keep pushing. And would try to find some more island of joy that’d keep me sane in these tiring times. As for now, only my GF keeps me afloat and I abandoned every hobby that needs my attention for I can’t manage it, but I’d try and find. Thank you.
To establish my surviving shitty states credentials: I grew up as a queer kid in the rural Bible Belt during the Clinton and Bush (both of them) years. The current environment may not be exactly the same, but IMO in many ways it’s very similar to the community I grew up in (extremely conservative, racist, and vindictive).
So, here are the things that kept me comparatively sane:
Watch subversive media, whatever that means to you. Being reminded that there is a wider world with people who aren’t like the ones surrounding you (whether it’s your family or wider community) is a powerful hope generator
Connect with similarly minded people in your local community, if you aren’t already. You might need to drive to a college town for this one, depending on your area. Having IRL connections with people who aren’t bastards will keep you sane
Find the joy you can, and make it when you can’t. If you don’t find things to be happy about it will seriously kill you. There’s always stuff to be miserable about, so don’t worry about overdoing it in the joy department
Do something you find meaningful. Volunteering, clean ups, whatever you feel drawn towards. Doesn’t even have to be anything official, like checking in on your loved ones
Get some healthy eating and exercise in when you can, too. If it doesn’t improve your mood it’ll at least let you sleep and poop better
Excellent post.
I would add:
Make a plan to run if you have to. Cash reserve, good backpack, identification and other paperwork, a couple of changes of clothes.
Make a plan to move. Save as much money as you can and set a date. We began planning our move in 2020 and our deadline was last summer.
We successfully completed our move to a better state and are much happier. Like a weight has been lifted off us. It was difficult but very much wotth it.
Thank you for inspiring me. I try to collect money to move, and although it seems like a lost cause rn, your positive experience makes me sure I do the right thing.
You can do it! We saved for years and spent as little as we could. It’s hard, but not impossible.
I can’t tell you how I appreciate your long answer. I already do parts of what you are suggesting. And I’d keep pushing. And would try to find some more island of joy that’d keep me sane in these tiring times. As for now, only my GF keeps me afloat and I abandoned every hobby that needs my attention for I can’t manage it, but I’d try and find. Thank you.