I just get so depressed because I recall that memory of that time when my father and mother were arguing about some financial decisions and mom threatened to divorce and abandon her “useless children”.

I remember feeling so scared I just hid in my room and cried.

I feel live me existing mader her so sad.

Maybe I shouldn’t have been born.

Maybe mom would be happier without me.

I hate myself.

I bring so much misery to this world.

I wasted so much of my mom’s attention, time, money.

What’s the point?

I kinda wanna die.

But then if I do, I basically burdened society for 20 years and “contributed nothing to society” and just “left this world so cowardly”

Wtf is existence? 😭