So I have been thinking about this for a while. I Am quite sure, that I am somewhere on the spectrum. Im not sure if Its autism or ADHD or somewhere between. I do observe quite a lot of behaviours in myself that regularly get associated with neuroduvergent people (example: I constantly observe different people to analysis how they act in “social interactions” (or other stuff too), because I kind if don’t know what society expects as social norms (etc.)).
Logically the next step would be to go to a psychologist and get tested for neurodivergency. The thing is, that I seriously do not see the use in doing so. I know all the different quirks I have quite good and how to deal with them. I also wouldn’t say, that they cause any sort of “day to day problems” for myself. Why should I invest the effort to search for a psychologist (I really should do that, but thats for this shitload of other problems I have) to get tested just so that I have a piece of paper that does not change anything in my day to day life.
If you want to asnwer i would like to know what kind of changes you speak about.
I mean, fundamentally, it kept me locked in a futile struggle to overcome my deficiencies so that I could be more acceptable to others.
Internalized ableism I suppose, but it’s also a core failure in behaviour if you want to have good self esteem.
Getting the actual assessment and a qualified diagnosis been very helpful in coming to acceptance for why Ive been so different my whole life. And thus Ive been able to finally become my actual self.
But thats me, maybe someone who grows up with the proper support and community can find their way without this. I needed authoritative proof to help me change.
Thank you very much for sharing! I am happpy to hear, that you could accept your self more =)
Yea its probably very individual. Still i like to imagine what a diagnosis could do good. I like that you call it authoritative proof.