I live in a city with great public transport and for years Google maps was great for bus/tube times and walking routes. Now after 6 years of no probs Google maps has forgotten the bus stop right under my window and thinks I should walk up or down the road to the next stop. It has forgotten the crossings what are still there, no road works or anything, and thinks I should take 15 min detour instead of just crossing the street right then and there. It’s clearly going downhill here.

Not to worry, I’m convinced you’re a good fren everyone wants to hang out with. Goblin-ness not mandatory.

But do you pile and hoard stuff, do you like to sit in a mound of blankets, do you eat stuff indiscriminately? All of that matters…

I have not owned or worn sweatpants for three decades but everything else applies to me. Am I unknowingly a goblin?

Apparently you can even make meringue with it. Haven’t tried that but I often make mayonnaise with aquafaba.

Tell that to cycling phone snatchers in London

Crimped?

All over it, non native English speaker who loves chocolate

Chocolate fudge pudding pie… that’s a dessert that just keeps on giving, I’d be so over that

Depends on time and location? I think I saw an actual lemon, not a picture or flavour, in my teens? Whereas a variety of homemade pickles were just there

My friend is French, his wife Portuguese, they live in England with their two children. When all together, they all speak English with each other. When the kids are with one parent, the speak that language. In the park with father, French. Baking with mother, Portuguese. Bedtime stories are in the language of the parent reading. Kids switch between languages easily and understand what to speak with whom. Effortless trilingual.

Another friend moved country with her husband and had three kids. Home language was always mother tongue, both my friends had fairly bad English. Everything outside parents is in English for the kids - media, school, anyone outside the household. Again, the switch for the kids is really easy, they are fluent and have no accent in both languages.

The temperatures are intuitive for me because Celsius is all I’ve known. The car going 60km/h or 100km/ h I know the difference and how it feels sitting in the car. The speed of wind in the forecast needs to be m/s to make any sense. Over 20 m/s I better tape the windows so that the storm won’t break them

14 years ago when I was still relatively young and liked clubbing, a song popped up and swept all the playlists in my country. Clubs, radio stations, you name it. Catchy French song. It came and went so fast that I didn’t manage to memorise it. That was long before I even dreamed of having a smartphone. When I moved to UK a year later, nobody had any idea what song I’m trying to describe, like they never heard it.

Probably around 8 years ago I was roaming the streets of Porto with my ex, and a shop we passed had the song blasting from the speakers. Praise the smartphones, I used ‘what’s the song’ app and et voila: Stromae - alors on danse

Nacho awakens cute aggression in me. I want to smoosh those cheeks with my thumbs while babbling nonsense like: who’s the pretty boy, cutie pie, mwah-mwah-mwah!

Take Maris Piper, that’s good for everything

I for one am very happy to have a daily Kitty in my feed. Please don’t stop

I’m a trained chef working the trade for 30 years. 2 years in vocational school, a year for cooking and a year for bakery/patisserie. I’m a really confident cook - the concept of different cuisines, the basic ingredients and seasonings, no probs. Baking is still a rocket science for me. My current head chef said baking is fun if you know what you are doing but I’m still after 30 years not fully confident about the consistency.

I got no sources to back it up but I’ve taken that as a fact for very long time: the symbol for Mars (male/masculine) is a shield and a spear. The symbol for Venus (female/feminine) is a handheld mirror, that cross under the circle is the handle.

Your cat is so very pleasingly cat shaped

I work in multinational company and I can say ‘thank you’ in 6-7 languages. I say abrigado to a Polish guy and spasibo to the Italian just for fun