• 0 Posts
  • 261 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: September 27th, 2023

help-circle







  • I feel differently. I don’t know the ex or their partner of course but I see it as an olive branch. They share blood through their child together. They’re going to have to be around each other regardless of how things ended. The only person who loses with this grudge being held is the kid between them.

    I yield that I have never been in the position of loving someone and being betrayed like that. I know it evokes strong feelings and I’m not minimizing that, but it doesn’t really matter at this point whose fault it is or who chose what. None of these bad feelings will ever change what happened or who that person is. The only thing you can change is your own behavior in the future and to manage your own feelings and expectations with that person so it doesn’t happen again. Fool me once, fool me twice and all that.

    So I’m not saying you have to forgive and forget. I wouldn’t ever put the ex in a position of personal closeness or trust ever again. If that’s what this is to OP then 100% stay home. However, if I am correct in seeing this as a chance to acknowledge what happened, move on, and lower tensions between them for the kid’s sake, then I think it can be positive. It’s also a valuable lesson for the kid to show them the ideal way for an adult to behave after interpersonal conflict, how they as an adult should ideally work through tough feelings.

    It depends on the person though. If you can’t move past those feelings, if you can’t model the ideal, which would be completely understandable, then the best thing is probably not to go. Work together with the kid to help them understand the situation. Might be time for a heart to heart with them and to let them in on the feelings you’ve been dealing with so they can fully understand what’s keeping you from going.


  • It’s a 14 year old kid, they’re mostly self sufficient at that point. Whether you’re “stuck” babysitting or get to relax on your own I see it as a win-win. If the couple want to squander their vacation time solely with each other (in which case, why did they take the extra week from OP instead of just leaving the kid with him the whole time??) while OP gets to bond with their child on a free vacation, I just don’t see how that’s a punishment.

    Leave it up to the kid, they’re the one that wanted their dad with them and the whole reason he’s invited.

    Abandoning your kid, making them feel like a burden, to go fuck around with strangers, just to get back at an ex who happens to be the mother of your child, seems like an asshole move here. Please don’t do this OP.

    Edit: OP is the father, my bad. Editing now.




  • I just thought the population would be more sober minded about the threat of ceding democracy to a demagogue who now has unchecked legal authority to remake society in his own image.

    Most normal people don’t want to believe that this is the case. They don’t have to, they have had the privilege of ignoring it, for they are not the ones being persecuted. It’s background noise and if anything it turns them off.

    People care about healthcare, education, cost of living, career prospects, inflation, basic rights, y’know stuff that pertains to them in their everyday lives. If the Republicans are the only ones pointing that stuff out and offering any solutions, even if their reasons and solutions are bullshit and serve bigoted ends, people will be swayed to vote for them and will doubt and explain away all the negative media because it’s unpleasant to think about.

    Democrats just don’t seem to be willing to champion popular policy, and that is why they lost.

    Anyways, seems like we’re only somewhat in disagreement.


  • We must be watching different elections and your version must have historic turnout, since americans are so enthusiastic about deporting immigrants and flattening gaza, no?

    Cause in mine I just see two unpopular candidates except one of them has cultivated a delusional cult to propel them forward and the other has the american electorate convinced that being evil is non-negotiable.


  • I think we need to stop wondering why Republicans are doing so well and with that, lamenting that just over half of the minority voting population in this country will proudly vote for open fascists; stop imagining voters in the middle who are going to magically defect from the right if Democrats outflank them on the right’s own invented issues; and start asking ourselves whose votes the Democrats are actually campaigning for if not ours.


  • If what you say is true, and I’m not suggesting it is- if our furthest left “viable” party can win on a platform that is funding genocide and barely opposing the fascists Republicans, then we were doomed no matter what.

    Firsf of all, don’t project your own arrogance onto the rest of us. Second, even ignoring Palestine, it was an objectively bad campaign. She didn’t offer anything material to vote for beyond not being trump.