The butterfat was exquisite but my fridge door isn’t strong enough to store it, so I keep it on the main shelf, but I had to move the HP sauce so things are a bit crazy here right now.
There will be dozens if not hundreds or thousands of people who legitimately review that jug of milk for Walmart for free.
Just one glass gives me a full days worth of vitamin R!
Most milk does a body good.
This milk does a body okay.
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Not cowgirl breast milk, very disappointing
Where may I purchase cowgirl breast milk? Is it free range?
Not sure but I’d like to know too
You know when you take that first spoonful of New England clam chowder and it’s like the universe whispers, “Slow down, buddy, you’re home now”? My family treated chowder like a sacred ritual…snowstorm outside, pot simmering inside, everyone pretending not to notice that my cousin Jimmy always stole the oyster crackers just to crush them up into fine cracker dust. And then use those as his own personal hacky sacks until the bags exploded.
You know when the steam fogs your glasses and suddenly you’re back in your grandparents’ kitchen, watching mammy stir the pot with the same wooden spoon that’s she’d had since before you were born? That spoon could have otherwise been a magic wand with the wonders she could prepare in that kitchen.
Sadly, mammy passed a few years back. Jimmy died a couple of days ago. OD’d on fentanyl; aspirated on a piece of potato from the chowder we had prepared together for lunch that day. He was looking pretty gaunt by then, and I thought cooking a big pot would bring back a little of the magic, like old times again.
Anyway, the rest of this gallon here still sits in my fridge. Aging day by day, slowly headed towards its expire date. Much like the rest of us. But maybe this review will be retained for some time long after. 5/5 - Rest well Jimmy, you’re home now. I miss you.
I don’t know what I just read but it was beautiful.
Rest in peace, Jimmy I honestly don’t know how true this story is, but for a second I thought I was reading a book (a good one)
Can we get a bigger image of the milk? I can’t masturbate to this low quality milk.
Competition is the catalyst of innovation. Keep going, and you can make better-quality milk to sell.
My MILK brings all the MILK to the yard, damn right, its better than MILK
Not with that attitude, buster
This image makes me cry…
Don’t cry over spilled milk.
0/10 didn’t even get to taste it.
You can lick it up.
I understand why my dad never came back. 5 out of 5.
I also understand why your dad never came back. 5.1 out of 5
“My daughter tried using this in her Bad Dragon donkey-sized dildo and made a huge mess. She was so embarrassed that she tried to clean it up herself and missed a bunch of spots. The damn house still smells like a cheesemonger’s stale fart from where this milk seeped into the corners of the carpet. Worked great though, looked just like cum. 4/5 stars.”
How do I delete someone else’s comment?
*how do WE delete OUR comment
I was very sad when I accidentally spilled it.
No crying!
Did you still get to eat it?
Drinking tit milk from a cow is BESTIALITY. That’s why I only drink human milk. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
- DJT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
I must admit if I ever get a partner who’d let me I kinda want to try it, always been weirdly curious.
Have you considered a career as a baby?
Me too, i’d like to try it. I don’t know why it’s so frowned upon.
It’s sweet and warm and getting it is pretty hot too!
Better experience than cows milk every time! But not many times lol
Better experience than cows milk
Yeah I’d assume that getting milk straight from the cow doesn’t measure up
I’ve tried it, nothing special or that surprising. I’m sure most involved fathers have tried it? I didn’t sit around drinking the stuff but I would help fill the bottles and bags and when warming it up I would drip it on my wrist to make sure it wasn’t too hot and lick it off. It never crossed my mind as anything that would seem weird or gross I guess. She never had a reaction if she was up and around when I did it.
It’s only 2% milk, the other 98% is chemicals
They turn the frickin’ frogs gay.
Do you understand that?!
Farmers, allegedly, have no way of ensuring that cow faeces does not enter the product at the milking stage and if the general public were to find out about it it could have an annihilating impact on the dairy market at large. Fortunately, I have not detected this issue in any way with this particular bottle. 5 stars.
Pasteurization
So what you’re saying is that the poop doesn’t have any germs in it.
Pasteurization is gonna blow your mind.
There is litterally poop on everything. Just type “fecal matter everything” into your favorite search engine and prepare to be horrified to exist.
???
It gets even better if you imagine the dude from dinosaur dinner theatre reading that out in his old time narrator voice
Goes great with Pepsi!
Pepsi with ice cream: a “black cow” that tastes like a nice milkshake
Pepsi with milk: “Pilk”, tastes like vomit
How come there is such a difference from the state of matter of the darnged milk?
Even better without the pepsi, as all things are.
“And for you?”
“I’ll have a Coke”
“Is Pepsi ok?”
“No…NO!!! IT’S NOT OK!!! NOTHING IS OK!!! WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO MEEEEE???”
runs out of the resteraunt sobbing
“…I don’t think that was about the Pepsi…”
Narrator: It was about the Pepsi.
All I wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi, and she wouldn’t give it to me.
That is a more than reasonable reaction to being offered pepsi in place of anything.
Goes great with meths. 5 stars
Tried it once. It makes me upset
I am still too this day shocked that I enjoy it soo much
