Now I understand the hype.

This is something I’ve been wanting to do for years honestly. As you all know, here in America we wipe with cheeseburgers and bald eagles. But I can’t begin to count how many times I’ve heard or read someone extolling the virtues of the bidet, usually from a European or a converted ‘Murcan.

So I finally decided it was time…began reading product reviews, found a brand new one for cheap on an auction site but…I misjudged the fit for my particular toilet. So that one had to go back in the box. Ended up going to a local store for one because I didn’t feel like waiting any longer and I could judge the fit with my own eyes.

Got one, brought it home, installed it, and…well friends I don’t know if buttholes believe in heaven, but if they do mine surely thinks it’s died and gone there. It’s not one of the super luxury models with the remote and smartphone app, but it’s got warm water, a seat warmer, and a warm air dryer. I’m hooked. In fact when I’m at work I now get annoyed that I don’t have access to it.

I now count myself among the converted. I’ve never felt so pampered.