• MermaidsGarden@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      49
      ·
      3 months ago

      Are people still talking about JD Vance having sex with a couch? We need to put to bed the idea of JD Vance having sex with a couch. It’s not appropriate for people to think of Vice Presidential candidate JD Vance having sex with a couch. JD Vance has gone on record to deny that he has had bare skin contact with a couch within the last 5 years. It’s absurd that JD Vance was banned from a Cleveland area IKEA after making sweet, passionate love to a KIVIK Sofa Chaise.

      Once again, there is no evidence of JD Vance having sex with a couch. You need to stop calling JD Vance a couchfucker.

      • evidences@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        17
        ·
        3 months ago

        Pssst just a heads up there’s no Cleveland area IKEA, there are however an Ikea in both the Columbus and Cincinnati areas.

        • jballs@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          17
          ·
          3 months ago

          They probably had to close the IKEA in Cleveland after homie fucked a couch in it. That’s the type of situation that will ruin a business.

        • Th3D3k0y@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          3 months ago

          Is all Appalachian… right? Like Middletown, middle of Appalachian town… Dude’s an idiot

      • photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        3 months ago

        I have no idea how one can avoid having bare skin contact with a couch for five years. Unless you always wear long sleeve shirts, socks and long pants and be very careful about where you put your hands.