Realistically Franklin: “So the women of today bathe regularly, are shaven, are disease free, and can decide to be incapable of pregnancy, and I can search for them easily in every city?!”
Jefferson: “You centralized the banks?!”
Franklin was a big fan of older women as well.
I think he would have a good time today.
That guy fucked
Dude was a straight up cougar hunter lol
I stand by the assertion that Benjamin Franklin would have learned about trans women and promptly attempted to cause a syphilis epidemic in the trans community based on his description for why he prefers older women
Modern Franklin: Damn this VR porn is fuckin sick
Washington: Oh, so y’all polarized the country into two separate parties when I specifically told you not to??
Adams: Didn’t I tell y’all about that slavery bullshit?
Tommy Jefferson: How can anyone live in NYC?
Benji Frank: You can just fly to France like a bird while you sleep to dunk your oui oui?
This is stupidly accurate. Fucker.
You let the supreme court say that the president is above the law!?!
“What the fuck is the internet?”
Then Ben Affleck would show them movie poop shoot dot com to demonstrate
Bahnnngggg
snootchie pootchies!
I think they would be surprised either that we still adhere to the Constitution (I.e., we haven’t replaced or rewritten it), or that there are so few amendments.
gestures vaguely at everything
“How should I bet on the Hamilton-Burr duel?”
Wait, you let the negroes vote? You let women vote? You let people that don’t own property vote?
“What the fuck happened here?”
- Ben Franklin edition
Who are you and how did you get in here?
“How do you control the masses when so many of them can vote?”
Turns out, the Electoral College can actually do the opposite of what it was intended for!
Or work as advertised on the box?
It was initially there to safeguard against populist demagogues with no sense of responsibility or decency who might destroy the country. Oops.
The usual stuff, propaganda and outright lies, but the most effective way is through echo chambers…
Just make people able to pick and choose with what communities they want to engage with and soon plenty of people will form self-radicalizing communities.
“why are all these black people not in slavery?”
I sincerely doubt they’d be asking that. Many of them would probably be happy we’d moved past that point.
https://www.history.com/news/declaration-of-independence-deleted-anti-slavery-clause-jefferson
My understanding is that many of them saw it as more of a necessary evil vaguely justified on racial grounds. We need to be willing to talk about and acknowledge America’s racist history with the slave trade, but we also need to understand the era and the fact that it was never broadly accepted as the right way to do things.
This might make folks uncomfortable, but it’s not all that dissimilar to folks buying cheap imported stuff today built primarily for the US consumer in sweatshop conditions, via outright slavery, and/or with various child labor schemes often at an extreme cost to the health of the environment. We’ve made things better but we’ve also recreated some of the problems that we’d destroyed in the WW II era with the justification of indirection (“well I didn’t do it, the big company I bought from did it”) instead of racism.
I fully expect a future generation to hold us to the pitchforks for buying cheap junk on Amazon or at Walmart and not ever asking “what behavior am I supporting? How did they make this at this price?”
That’s not the question they would ask. Slaves were considered property, not people. Well, until they became 3/5 of a person. And finally, much later on a full person.
3/5 compromise wasent even about considering them as “mostly” people. It was about how they should be counted as far as a census was concerned, in order to determine the amount of congressional representation for that state. They still had no rights and were fully considered property.
If only Jon brown had been one of the founders.
Oh absolutely. It was the southern whites wanting more power than they are worth.
true, the founders were even worse than I could put into words
And yet, there are people, right now, who idolize that.
yeah, the republican party and every single one of their voters
I think it’s unproductive to treat the founding fathers as a monolith. What Franklin and Hamilton believed was markedly different than the likes of Patrick Henry or Jefferson
A large majority of the founders would disagree
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_presidents_of_the_United_States_who_owned_slaves
Even during the 3/5th era, they were 0/5ths a person and an extra 3/5th a person to the slave owners who could actually vote. Spoiler alert: the slave owners did not vote with their slave’s best interests in mind.
I think they would say, “what’s this I hear about women voting? and, uh, who was that in the White House from 2012-2020?? was that one of Thomas Jefferson’s grandchildren?”
credit to Joe Machi on season 8 of Last Comic Standing, the only season that I’ve watched.
“What do you mean you might elect a black woman” is probably a big one they’ll be mad about. They weren’t good people
“Shit, that white house is lit fr tho” - Georgie Washington
