Thinking that things they don’t enjoy should not be enjoyed by anyone else, and complaining bitterly about people enjoying those things.
People who stay with abusive partners the first time they are abused
Dancing.
I’m biased because I’m rythmically deficient, but it makes no sense to me. It’s just weird wiggling.
Worse still is clubbing, which is just dancing in a hot, sweaty dark room where the drinks are $13 each amd you don’t get to pick the music, or turn the volume down.
This might be the most boomer thing I’ve ever written.
People out here stating obvious human problems and I’m out here like: why do humans like Chocolate?
This product costs $14 to make, they sell it for $30.
They remove three screws and replace the beautiful $6 screen with a bottom of the barrel $3 screen saving $3.06. People would easily pay $5 more for the nicer screen, but they can only focus on cost cutting instead of making a still modestly priced great product.
How some people have to constantly get into someone else’s business that doesn’t have any negative affect on their lives or society and try to force the latter to conform to the former’s worldview. Religion is notorious for this, demanding others conform to the ideology’s rules even if they have no desire to participate or believe, but it can also be as simple as being critical of someone’s differences and trying to make them change.
People being mean or cruel to other people or living things just to see them suffer. I don’t understand it.
Using LinkedIn
Abuse.
Over compensating when an injustice is learned. We don’t change anything meaningful, it seems, and when this happens, we create a whole new problem
people that have more money than they could ever spend trying to accumulate more money
When I go to poor countries I tip/donate well beyond what I’m told is normal, because $10 or $20 is nothing to me, but potentially more money than they’ll earn in days/weeks. It always makes them so happy.
What happiness I would make with a billion…
And that’s why you’ll never be a billionaire. See how that works out?
I don’t think that’s the reason. It is part of it, but the main reason you’ll never be a billionaire is that you would need to take from people.
Nah, that’s not why. A billionaire can give millions away without any impact on their life.
There are two paths to becoming a billionaire. The first is to hit the Goldilocks zone of a good product with mass appeal, good distribution and to have significant ownership of it. The second is to already BE rich. Most billionaires are the second one.
When I went to Puerto Rico (same country, poorer area) my wife and I went on a guided paddle boarding ride that included him teaching us how to paddle board, then paper boarding, we met a couple wild manatees who came right up to us, then we went snorkeling. I believe he did groups of up to 6, but there were 2 no shows and 2 empty spots so it was just my wife and I for a 2 - 3 hour trip and was an absolute blast. I don’t remember how much it cost, probably $60 - $100 each range. At the end we tipped him like $40 and it looked like he was going to cry. I honestly thought tipping that much on a guided tour like that was upper end of normal, but his reaction made me think he doesn’t usually get tips like that.
Some species of chimps beat other chimps that horde to the detriment of the group to death
.
This is just a nature fact.
It’s not about the money; it’s about the power.
We stay hungry, we devour.
It’s an addiction for some. For others, it’s like a security blanket. For others, it’s a source of power.
Mr Crabs: I like money 💰
I think there’s a number of different aspects to this that could put it in context.
Yes there are a few obscenely wealthy people, like a dozen in the world, for whom it’s just a game and pretty meaningless. For the remaining merely wealthy people:
Your means increase as you move through life and your responsibilities, commitments, and tastes also increase. I might earn 6 times what I did when I was 20, but now I’m supporting a family et cetera. This same dynamic effects wealthy people in a similar but different way. People tend to live beyond their means. Someone making several million a year might end up with a few holiday homes, a mistress or something, a bunch of truly expensive hobbies (like… a horse stud farm or something). They might realise they’re “wealthy” but unless they earn a bunch more money they won’t be able to race their horse in qatar or whatever thing they desperately need to do to validate themselves.
Another aspect I’ve heard of, is that wealthy people are often anxious of losing everything. If you have a business that earns millions, it’s sensible to worry that the market might change and suddenly it’s worthless. This is the reality for the majority of businesses that are not publicly traded. As in, great grandpa formed a company that made squillions of dollars selling woollen socks during the first and second world war, but by the 80s it was really just ticking over paying wages and by the 90s it was insolvent. It’s natural to want to consolidate your position by buying some other company that makes hats or whatever.
The vast majority of people only accumulate enough wealth for their own lives. Once you’ve reached that point where you really couldn’t reasonably spend the wealth you’ve accumulated, then you’ve probably already switched over to accumulating wealth for your progeny. Lasting generational wealth is more or less impossible unless you own a country or something because your progeny increases exponentially, and their lavish tastes increase, and their ability to make sensible financial choices decreases.
Finally, you don’t end up with more money than you could ever spend by being satisfied with however much money.
I think it’s easily understandable honestly. They got to this point a certain way and it’s become habit and a source of their power which they strive to increase. At a certain level of wealth it also just increases by itself.
Real life incremental game!
There’s a lot of human behavior I don’t understand. Used to make me feel like an alien as a kid.
Like the super unhealthy parasocial relationships people think they have with famous people, and more appalling is the way the media feeds right into it. People acting like it’s normal to obsess over details about celebrities personal lives is very weird to me.
I don’t understand cheating… just break up and then you can fuck who you want. Why does deceiving someone and breaking their trust have to be a part of it? Why is that necessary?
I don’t understand how you can be the richest elongated muskrat in the world, so rich you just doubled your wealth, and not do anything to help people who need it. I don’t know how he can live with himself. And what I really don’t get is that he clearly wants the world to see him as some sort of important amazing brilliant person. So why not do the thing. DO THE THING AND HELP YOU SELFISH FUCK
Don’t even get me started with bigotry. It just does not make sense. Why does someone’s skin pigment effect people so drastically? Why does the gender or sexual orientation of strangers matter? People need to focus on themselves and mind their business. If someone would like to make minding your business the new fad of 2025 I’m here for it.
I haven’t ever cheated but I’m an armchair human development nerd and I’d assume that there are some things at play like:
- Social narratives that make it seem like there’s only one true love out there for you (assuming the cheating here is only physical and not love).
- There can be shame in divorce or breaking up.
- There’s the sunk cost fallacy of staying with someone because you’ve put so many years into the relationship.
- If there are kids, people can believe (whether it’s true or not) that it’s harmful to the kids to separate
- People compartmentalize and can develop really weird cognitive dissonance where they build two realities and can operate as if the two have nothing to do with each other. It’s hard to explain.
- All the other collateral with separating, like potentially moving, new financials and potential child support/alimony, custody challenges, health insurance through marriage, job shifts, etc. etc.
Before you angrily hit reply, dear reader, I’m not defending or condoning cheating. I’m just trying to answer the sociological question of why it’s a behavior that happens enough that we’re talking about it in this thread.
Top shelf response. I’d happily have a drink at a bar or Cafe with you, and chew the fat.
Wow thanks friend, that’s really nice to hear. I’d be up for it
Can I join?
Hell yeah you can, anyone whose up for noncombative conversation is welcome to hang out with me
Excellent, I’ll buy us all a round if you find us a booth 😊
Good vibes and deep meaningful conversations.
I don’t understand cheating either, but I come at it from the perspective of a queer polyamorous person. I think many people are capable of loving more than one person, but society tells us monogamy is the only ethical/viable way. My partners are totally fine with me sleeping with other people, and that’s because we have clear and open communication and trust. Why cheat when you can be poly or open?
I don’t understand why relationships are portrayed as such a burden in media. Why do people who don’t trust one another even get into relationships? Why do so many couples seem to hate eachother? Why do so many romance books have such a creepy power imbalance, do people want that? It’s all so confusing, and I’m glad I’m not apart of it.
There are so many heinous people do because of their primal sexual drives that everything just seems so bizarre to me. I have never had the ability to experience such desires that are supposed to be instincts that everyone does. So it’s really odd as an outsider to see what sex does to people.
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Causes them to cheat on others. Why? Why harm people instead of breaking up like you said.
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Causes them to r**e others. Why? Why can’t you just masturbate? Why do you have to harm others to get this?
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Causes them to murder others out of jealousy. Why?
As an alien, I only see the downsides to sex. It’s honestly saddening how common these are.
2 and 3 are violent crimes, and horrid. 1 tho? Really? How about if it’s (hypothetically) cheating on 1 person, whom has cheated multiple times, and lied reptitively about it, to keep doing so? And what if, again very hypotheically, the person who retaliated by cheating did so with say… more than one person, at the same time?
Edgecases are are to be considered with these things, even when definitely not real life, personal experience. 😶
There is always nuance in everything. Didn’t mean to imply that there wasn’t. Actually, my mom was a cheater. But she cheated on her abusive husband that she was afraid to leave. So I didn’t consider it to be immoral. In fact, I was amused when I found out.
In a majority of cheating cases, that’s not how it all plays out. So a majority of times cheating is incredibly immoral and hurtful to the other person. Occasionally it isn’t, but that isn’t the majority of cases.
I definitely agree, dingus. Most cases tend to be kind of sad, and pretty self-centered. Escaping an abusive relationship almost always complicated, and I’m glad for anyone who gets out of them.
Also, I know someone with a cheating proclivity… The dude is loyal and committed, but enjoys the experience, which is unfortunate for all parties involved, really. At least he knows how to avoid the allure, and is happily with someone he loves.
Stonger than I am, because if a person told me to give up almost anything I find enjoyable, I’d tell them to find someone else, no matter the type of relationship. Hedonism is only a treadmill when the payoff decreases, which means one is probably bad at hedonic pursuit.
Your last paragraph reads rather odd to me. Poly relationships exist but involve mutual consent. That’s the reason why cheating in many cases is not at all ok. Because the other party doesn’t consent to it and it’s done in secrecy and deep violation of the person’s trust. It’s ok to have multiple partners or have sex with other people. You can too if you want to! But everyone involved has to agree with that kind of a setup for a relationship. Hiding it and hurting the other person is almost always immoral and wrong, even if it “feels good” to you. There are ways that all parties can consent to make your “feeling good” not hurting or taking advantage of others.
That’s fair. I guess the risk factor would be what does it for most people who enjoy that, which isn’t great. Poly would not be the same I assume, kind of like a TENS unit vs something closer to the “risk of complications” zone, but with trust, instead of current… And I guess the risk of betrayal and ended relationships, in place of being injured or worse.
Sorry for the semi-morbid and sussy analogy.
Taking advantage is always a non-option personally, but but hurting others or vise versa is pretty much always fine tbh, as long as consent has been given… It’s quite a conundrum! The worst best/worst part is that the hurting can be non-physical as well. I sometimes wonder what having a less cooked mind is like, but it’s not easy to imagine.
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I don’t know how he can live with himself.
There’s a thing our brains do when we have power like wealth, status, fame, etc. - the parts responsible for empathy are suppressed. The rich and powerful are neurologically less capable of considering the suffering of others.
Oh I’m aware, I meant the ‘I don’t know how’ more like the very idea of being ok with that is incomprehensible to me
I think we truly are “alien” souls, being brought into this world for the first time. I can empathize with the people who allow themselves to be wrapped up in our modern society but I always wonder, when will we realize that our way of life is absolutely miserable and we need to change our society ASAP if we want to survive through the next 50-100 years.
Devil’s advocate/explainer here:
Parasocial relationships are real, just one-direcrional, and can lead to really unhealthy tendencies, but don’t have to.
Cheating isn’t cute, but can be hot. Hear me out. If cumming became entirely illegal, disallowed, and frowned upon, you can bet your bottom dollar at least ~40% of people would do it more often, just because taboo is the (often fun) flipside of social norms. And social norms suck ass, in a not fun way.
And mega-wealth isn’t a money thing. The pieces of shit get off on power over other people, and use it to generate, or further misery. There isn’t much they seem to care about outside of that.
I’m not about to make a case for bigots though… Fuck that shit lmao.
Littering is one of those things I struggle the most to understand.
I can somewhat grasp it in extreme cases, like when you’re dealing with something really dirty and there’s nowhere to put it. But I’m talking about casual littering - things like throwing candy wrappers on the ground when you could just as easily put them in your pocket.
I don’t think anyone sees themselves as a bad person. Even when we engage in bad behavior, we usually have some story we tell ourselves to justify it. But I can’t put myself in the mindset of someone who casually throws trash on the ground for someone else to clean up. It’s kind of like walking around and cussing at random people - it just doesn’t make any sense. You have to know that you’re the problem.
Cigarettes are one that particularly bother me, because they’re so gross even compared to most other litter, but throwing them wherever is so normalised among smokers.
I still refuse to understand why littering is so common in my country. It seriously makes the cities look horrible.
Still remember the just piles and piles of garbage at the beaches and shrines around Mumbai.
I thought it couldn’t get any worse.
What?
I meant that I thought the garbage situation in my country was bad enough, I didn’t expect something worse.
Be of good cheer! We Americans have come a long way since I was a kid in the 70s. If I sent younger folks back, they would shit kittens. This is the UK, but it feels the same. Shit was mounded on the highways. People would casually chunk fast food bags. Can’t remember that last time I saw that. Cigarette butts used to fly like tracers at night. Again, haven’t seen that in ages.
More good news! Sorta. I haul loads of trash out of the woods and waterways around here. To the point where my wife and kids are like, “Daddy! Don’t mess with that!” I’m borderline obnoxious about it, done stupid shit to get a plastic bottle or fishing bobber.
Experience from these adventures tells me that most wasn’t deliberately tossed. Don’t know how to qualify that, I just have a sense for how long it’s been in the sun, how far it’s buried, the type of trash, whatever. It blew off a boat or pickup bed, overflowing trash can flowed downhill with the rains (loads of that), got loose from the trash man and never picked up, drunk and “oops”, stuff like that. Kids ditching beer cans so to not get busted is crystal clear! :)
I’ve cleaned out the woods around here, miles and miles of trails, and there’s hardly anything new to find. Always a little surprised when I see new litter. Know what I do find half the time? My own trash. “Hey! That’s my coozie!” or “How did I drop that?!” or “Shit. Missed my beer can on the return trip.”
Pick up more than you lay down, we’ll all make it.
I saw some dude in a small convertible chuck a whole-ass fast food bag out of his car at a stop light. I sped in front of him and called him a cunt. He was VERY angry. His lil rage-out for some great dashcam footage.
We’re all guilty of littering. Even the most careful of us will drop something without noticing- And I know I’m not the most careful. So I try and make up for what I’ve dropped by picking up bits of litter here and there.
Especially out in nature. When I see a bottle top or something, I tend to think to myself that the person who left that there is a bit of a dick. Now I have a choice - pick it up, or leave it there.
If I leave it there, then suddenly I am the dick I was complaining about.
I’ve argued with litterers before and it goes along the lines of “it’s already messy, everyone’s doing it”. Same sort of excuses you get from cheaters and such. I don’t mean to go all edgy Joker but there’s probably things you and I do that are a problem but we don’t see it because everyone else does it too. Eating meat and emitting tons of co2 for example.
“Then don’t add to the mess” is my usual response,
I’ve had smoking friends who refuse to stand further from a doorway and blowing it in peoples faces with the “air is already polluted with cars” argument
Me:”then don’t add more!”
It’s a weak argument. One with the easiest hole to poke. Also great answer if you’re trying to filter out the idiots from your friends group.
Most people are courteous enough not to idle their car with the exhaust pipe right in a doorway. Their analogy is some serious mental gymnastics.
I feel this a lot. Many criminals who have done wretched things at least have a comprehensible motivation, but littering? Cigarette butts in a nature reserve? It’s nihilism, solipsism. That honestly scares me more. I can grasp that some people’s care is misguided or distorted, but a lack of care at all? How do you even contend with that?
When walking to a train station, I find fast food meal bags and empty plastic bottles in the sidewalk every day. If it’s not too gross I take it with me the 30 meters to next public bin.
I really don’t get it. Wherever your going, there will most likely be a trash bin. It’s not gonna impact your fuel costs. What are they thinking?
I’ve put wrappers in my pocket on numerous occasions and lost them over the course of the next hour (usually depends on which clothes/pockets) so that might be part of what causes there to be so much litter but I have never intentionally thrown anything into nature besides a banana peel when I was a child. Throwing the banana peel into nature felt wrong but probably still is better than having walked a couple of hours with it to reach a mixed bin where it would rot and then maybe be burned.
I don’t think that dropping rubbish is necessarily that bad. The problem comes when it persists in the environment for hundreds of years because it’s not biodegradable.
How do you separate the two? The fact that it persists in nature for hundreds of years is what makes it bad. I don’t mind someone throwing banana peels into a forest.
Yea, that’s what I mean. I call rubbish anything that gets thrown away though, so for me a banana skin is still rubbish but it is not bad in the same way as a plastic bottle. I probably wasn’t clear enough in my downvoted first comment. But I am sick, so forgive me.
Banana peels take up to two years to decompose, unless they’re in the right environment such as a compost heap where the process speeds to 6-9 months
That’s still lightyears ahead of cigarette butts and plastic bottles, but a lot of people don’t realize how long their trash lasts for
Celebrity gossip. I’m just not interested in who married who, who’s wearing what, who’s doing who.
And reality TV, but if ratings are any indication, I’m the weird one on that.
Can I add fashion to this?
100% willing to admit I’m the weird one here, or maybe I’m just old enough now, but holy cow some trends are just daft and make people look like absolute idiots.
I live in a regional / remote area where fashion tends to take several years to arrive… presently all the studly men are wearing their socks pulled up? It’s just silly.
… and don’t get me started on sunglasses and frames. IDK how to describe the current trend… it’s like a huge single piece of plastic instead of 2 discrete lenses.
Going to church by choice. That shit is boring.
Though I don’t go now non-Protestant or high church is significantly more personally and religiously entertaining. Garage band Protestantism is the bane of my existence
